It is also remembered for such suspenseful spy moments such as when the professor in charge of things repeatedly broadcasts his burps to his sexy assistant’s speaker-broach in an effort to prevent her from getting hot and heavy with the Latin American dictator she’s trying to seduce as part of a plot to kidnap him.
There’s also the incident where the Professor plays some funky music over the ship’s radio as part of his getaway plan which causes the sailors on other ships who hear it to do some simple dance steps. Clearly, the world of mid 1960s Italian espionage cinema was one where thinking outside the box was as routine as using giant electromagnets on a submarine to hijack a large freighter loaded down with Russian gold!
The Golden Men are captured during a daring robbery right at the beginning of the movie setting the stage for them to work for the government in an effort to save the world from the evil machinations of the Castro-like leader of a sweaty island nation!
The fact that this general’s most diabolical scheme seems to involve dating the Golden Men’s sexy lady sidekick, Giorgia, is really irrelevant since the Golden Men have also booked themselves an additional secret mission to carry out during the boring parts of the kidnapping plan. Besides, dealing with this dictator is so easy, they only invade his island with three Golden Men and a jeep!
Even all that firepower seemed to be overkill with what Giorgia brought to the table! She sneaks into the general’s compound with a camera and begins taking pictures of him before being captured. She explains that she’s from Playgirl magazine and is there to do a story on him.
You have to remember that this movie was made before there was a Playgirl magazine so it is understandable that the general’s reaction was a positive one instead of just being creeped out by the prospect of appearing next to a nude pictorial of a smooth long-haired guy named Colt. It also probably didn’t hurt that Giorgia was decked out in a skintight black bodysuit either.
Giorgia’s spytacular outfits, endless supply of wigs, and her rainbow collection of colored contacts will keep the viewer moderately intrigued throughout an otherwise uninvolving film.
Except for the surly Adolph, the Golden Men are indistinguishable from one another, the action is mediocre with an over reliance on silly-looking gadgets, and the multiple mission plot only serves to diminish the importance of both missions, especially since one of them is just a standard gold heist accomplished with some sleeping gas and the aforementioned magnets. That the movie has about ten extra minutes of double cross endings tacked on to fill out it’s running time only further serves to hamper the effort to maintain any interest in the goings on.
Still, enough of the trappings of 1960s Eurospy flicks are present to no doubt satisfy hardcore fans. In addition to the boxing glove bazooka, there were infrared goggles, bulky video camera belts, a weird looking swamp boat/hover craft thing, a one-man submarine shot up to the second floor of the general’s headquarters, an interrogation device that showed what was in someone’s mind, and even a couple of jet packs!
The soundtrack packed a good variety of tunes from Russian dirges, to an Anchors Aweigh-inspired ditty, to the more standard swinging mod music you would expect. The Professor even occasionally dressed like John Steed!
And when the Professor babbles about there being 7000 tons of gold, you don’t get shortchanged on that either! Several scenes show mammoth stacks of gold bars including the best sequence of the film that has the Seven Golden Men turning against one another and waging an all out war on an island beach among towering mounds of bullion! It’s like The Treasure of the Sierra Madre with belching spies by way of an old Justice League of America comic book! It’ll leave you shaking with a healthy dose of Golden Men Fever, but not in a Playgirl sort of way!
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