The Concorde… Airport ’79 (1979)

Joe Patroni is back! The spiritual center of the Airport series (strictly by default since he’s the only recurring character in all four films) completes a journey that began in the original Airport when he was the chief mechanic who helped shovel out a snowbound plane on Runway 29. Since that blizzardy night, he’s become an executive at a different airline, gone on to be a liaison between the military and yet another company, before finally settling in at a fourth airline as a pilot who now magically has 30 years experience flying all manner of aircraft! Continue reading “The Concorde… Airport ’79 (1979)”

Avalanche (1978)

An avalanche of stock footage and primitive special effects conspire to bury poor bloated Rock Hudson’s career in this Roger Corman-produced late 70s entry in the disaster film canon. And while the avalanche sequence, regardless of how unconvincingly it was edited, at least provided the only moments of excitement, the film otherwise seemed intent on putting so little effort into even the expected tropes of the genre you barely were given a chance to laugh at the characters’ various crises! Continue reading “Avalanche (1978)”

Avalanche (1999)

When America’s Last Frontier is threatened by certain destruction, it falls on the shoulders of one man to rescue the babe, save the city, and outsmart a murderous herd of polar bears! He also has to break through the emotional barrier his best friend’s old lady erects because she blames him for the death of the man they both loved! And if that wasn’t enough, he’s got to go and survive having his plane shot down in the mountains! Continue reading “Avalanche (1999)”

Battle of the Commandos (1969)

Those of you who’ve seen Umberto Lenzi‘s World War II movie Bridge To Hell and lamented that it was obviously the work of a master who had long since past his time obviously have not seen his Battle Of The Commandos. If you had, you would have lamented that Umberto never had any prime to get past!

Made 17 years before his feeble 1986 attempt, Battle Of The Commandos makes only the slightest of efforts to go through the motions of the “misfits on a suicide mission” flick. For his part, Lenzi makes only the slightest of efforts not to make the viewer nauseous with his abusive use of the zoom lens and whiplash-inducing panning shots. Continue reading “Battle of the Commandos (1969)”

Blackbelt (1992)

If you’ve ever wondered why all those Italian slasher movies feature models getting stalked instead of some other occupation, Blackbelt provides the answer. Don “The Dragon” Wilson‘s movie features a singer being stalked by a crazed fan. Since she is a singer there are scenes of her singing and filming a music video. Spoiler alert! Crazed fan’s total derangement is not caused by repeated exposure to singer belting out one of her rancid pop tunes! Continue reading “Blackbelt (1992)”

Terror Force Commando (1986)

Ripped from the headlines of 1985 which your local newspaper surely never covered! But that didn’t mean it never happened! Just that no one gave a crap about it! But if you weren’t so wrapped up watching The Goonies and rocking out to “Sussidio” then you might have realized that half a world away, events were transpiring that demanded the armed intervention of none other than Richard Harrison! Of course I’m talking about the Pope’s trip to Cameroon! Continue reading “Terror Force Commando (1986)”