Poor Sarah Hardy had the worst funeral ever! I don’t mean the one they had for her. She was too busy faking her death to worry too much about that one. I’m talking about the one that happened 15 years earlier for her beloved father. No doubt that was a downer, but then her crazy mom had to go and ruin a perfectly good mourning buzz by causing multiple scenes! Continue reading “The Haunting of Sarah Hardy (1989)”
There are all sorts of twists and turns in Along Came A Spider, an ABC Moive of the Week starring Suzanne Pleshette and Ed Nelson as a couple of star-crossed psychopath lovers. Sometimes, you’ll think she’s crazy, sometimes you’ll think he’s crazy and sometimes watching the mindgames going on between her archeologist character and his physicist character, you’ll wonder if we shouldn’t just shut down all the universities and make people get real jobs where they don’t have so much free time to concoct meticulous murders and frame ups. Continue reading “Along Came a Spider (1970)”
I’m sure Airport resonated with the fossils who saw it when it first came out way back in 1970. Back in those days, you could slap Burt Lancaster’s name on a movie poster and people would pay to see just about anything, even a movie where he just drove back and forth from his office to different parts of airport!
In those more innocent/clueless days gone by, you could watch a sweaty nervous guy just bring a primitive bomb onto a plane and think “shoot, that could probably happen about six or seven times a week at any old airport!” There were probably even folks back then who actually owed some of star Dean Martin’s record albums! Continue reading “International Airport (1985)”
Joe Patroni is back! The spiritual center of the Airport series (strictly by default since he’s the only recurring character in all four films) completes a journey that began in the original Airport when he was the chief mechanic who helped shovel out a snowbound plane on Runway 29. Since that blizzardy night, he’s become an executive at a different airline, gone on to be a liaison between the military and yet another company, before finally settling in at a fourth airline as a pilot who now magically has 30 years experience flying all manner of aircraft! Continue reading “The Concorde… Airport ’79 (1979)”
An avalanche of stock footage and primitive special effects conspire to bury poor bloated Rock Hudson’s career in this Roger Corman-produced late 70s entry in the disaster film canon. And while the avalanche sequence, regardless of how unconvincingly it was edited, at least provided the only moments of excitement, the film otherwise seemed intent on putting so little effort into even the expected tropes of the genre you barely were given a chance to laugh at the characters’ various crises! Continue reading “Avalanche (1978)”
A group of art thieves hijack a plane by using knockout gas! The pilot is a progressive man who wants to marry his girlfriend, but she’s straight out of Ms. Magazine and is too career minded to commit! Familiar TV faces abound on this doomed flight including Brenda Vacarro, Darren McGavin and Gil Gerard! The plane comes equipped with gartguan-sized videodisc player! Even better, it also comes equipped with a lounge singer! And the whole thing crashes into the Bermuda Triangle! Truly, Airport ’77 is the most gloriously 70s of the four Airport movies! (Or any movie for that matter!) Continue reading “Airport ’77 (1977)”
With its all star cast of Charlton Heston, George Kennedy, Karen Black’s crazy eyes and the plane’s altimeter, Airport 1975 is easily five years better than 1970’s Airport!
Wisely tripling the fatalities (from one to three), ramping up the drama among the passengers (Will Linda Blair’s Janice survive the trip to get her kidney transplant? Will Myrna Loy’s Mrs. Devaney create an even worse crisis following the mid air collision that kills the crew by drinking the airplane’s in flight adult beverage selection completely dry? Will the singing nun further traumatize the already shellshocked stewardesses by doing an acoustic version of “Seasons in the Sun?”), casting Erik Estrada (CHiPS‘s Ponch) as a cringe-inducing horny Latin stereotype and being a half hour shorter than Airport‘s transatlantic length 137 minutes, Airport 1975 is perfectly crafted to improbably make the overheated and silly original feel like a classic of nuance and sophistication. Continue reading “Airport 1975 (1974)”