Zorro in the Court of England (1970)

zorrointhecourtofenglandposter2First off, I should probably disabuse you of the notion that at some point during this film Zorro will be swinging from the curtains in Buckingham Palace and carving a “Z” on the Queen of England’s royal backside.

Zorro is in the Court of England only in the sense that he happens to be shacked up with his manservant Pedrito in the English colony of Bermuda. How he got there all the way from California and why he is surrounded by peasants with Spanish sounding names who are played by Italians is one of those questions best left for director Franco Montemurro. Forty percent of Franco’s five film directing output consists of Zorro movies, so he ought to know, right? Continue reading “Zorro in the Court of England (1970)”

Buffalo Bill and the Indians, or Sitting Bull’s History Lesson (1976)

Robert Altman and Paul Newman team up to give us some revisionist history about America’s greatest hero, Buffalo Bill. Mind you, I have no idea what Buffalo Bill ever did that was so dang great. I’m guessing that he killed some buffalo and Indians or something back in times when that sort of thing could pass for an occupation. Continue reading “Buffalo Bill and the Indians, or Sitting Bull’s History Lesson (1976)”

Django (1966)

Django is widely regarded as the other movie that kickstarted the entire Spaghetti Western genre. Coming out about two years after Clint Eastwood’s and Sergio Leone’s A Fistful Of Dollars, Django somehow was the one that actually caught on in a huge way in the foreign market (though it remained virtually unseen in America for years) and caused not only every Italian guy with access to a camera to make a new-style western, but also caused them to put Django’s name in every one of their titles whether it was actually about a guy named Django or not. Continue reading “Django (1966)”

Godmonster of Indian Flats (1973)

If this movie stayed on task and was solely about the wondrous odyssey of a giant sheep and his befuddled and alcoholic owner, you would have had a classic on your hands. However, the bulk of the movie deals with (for no apparent reason) a crooked mayor named Silverdale. Mayor Silverdale babbles endlessly about recreating and keeping the past alive in his town and uses this as a reason to refuse to sell mining leases to Barnstable who represents a powerful mining company. As fascinating as all this non-wheeling and dealing is, I paid my money to find out exactly what the hell a Godmonster was! Continue reading “Godmonster of Indian Flats (1973)”

The Big Country (1958)

Gregory Peck is James McKay, which means that I had to suppress a snicker whenever someone started talking about Jim McKay buying that spread of land called the Big Muddy and getting himself involved in a range war, since I kept expecting Jim McKay to start talking about the “thrill of victory” after getting the Big Muddy and bemoaning “the agony of defeat” after the Major (don’t ask) and Burl Ives shoot each other during the big canyon showdown that brings the movie to its close. Continue reading “The Big Country (1958)”