Their names roll off my tongue far easier than they ever had a right to: Tobruk, Corregidor, Guadalcanal. And even now after all these years, sometimes late at night when the house is at its quietest and I close my eyes, all I can see are the flares lighting up the night, illuminating the hellish place (probably a studio backlot) of dirt and rock and blood where I watched a bunch of actors dig in, praying that some Axis pillbox didn’t hit the jackpot, sending a telegram to our moms and dads that began “we regret to inform you.” Continue reading “Halls of Montezuma (1950)”
Category: 1950s
The Desert Rats (1953)
Richard Burton plays a Scottish officer named MacRoberts who somehow gets put in charge of a group of Australian soldiers at Tobruk during World War II. The Aussies are a rowdy bunch and one guy was already wasted (on Fosters no doubt) and in no condition to do anything except drop his booze on the ground! We’re busting our humps in the Pacific and everywhere else and these dolts are acting like the Libyan desert is South Padre island! Continue reading “The Desert Rats (1953)”
The Abominable Snowman (1957)
An early effort from Hammer Films, The Abominable Snowman is an unremarkable and talky hunt for Yetis in the Himalayas. Peter Cushing plays a wuss botanist named Dr. John Rollason who’s up in those parts doing prissy things like studying rare plants, sipping tea, and generally sucking up to the lama that runs the monastery that he, his way too young wife and his weirdo wimpy assistant are crashing at during the course of their stay. Continue reading “The Abominable Snowman (1957)”
20 Million Miles to Earth (1957)
King Kong was pretty bad ass as far as monsters go. Worshipped as a god on his awesome island home, he fought an all-star cast of dinosaurs. Later, he stole a beautiful woman and bragged about it by climbing the biggest building in the greatest city on Earth. Then he took on the air power of the United States. Even his death was epic, crashing in a big smelly heap all those stories to the ground while folks waxed poetic about beauty killing the beast. In 20 Million Miles to Earth, the Ymir fought a dog. And got stabbed in the back with a pitchfork. Continue reading “20 Million Miles to Earth (1957)”
The Master of Ballantrae (1953)
Did you know that Errol Flynn had a seedier, puffier, older brother also named Errol? Me neither, but he tried to follow in his more glamorous and roguish brother’s footsteps by starring in a movie about Scottish dudes getting worn out by the British Empire and turning tail and becoming pirates in beautiful Tortuga Bay. Oh wait – that was Errol Flynn in this movie! Continue reading “The Master of Ballantrae (1953)”
Belles on Their Toes (1952)
The Gilbreths, whose sole claim to fame is that they have never heard of birth control, stage an unwelcome return in this, the sequel to the insipid Cheaper By the Dozen and the results are more of the same: meandering stories that don’t hold your interest, moments designed to evoke laughs that succeed only in provoking yawns, and the complete downplaying of all but about two or three of the daughters. Continue reading “Belles on Their Toes (1952)”
From Here to Eternity (1953)
From Here To Eternity won eight Academy Awards back in 1953, but not Best Actor. I assume that Montgomery Clift and Burt Lancaster split the votes in that category though it’s hard to argue with winner William Holden’s performance as the crabby lone wolf in Stalag 17 either.
Clift was the heart of the picture, batting his doe-like eyes to and fro, refusing to break under all the pressure heaped on him by a boxing-obsessed captain, while Lancaster was the libido of the film, testosterone practically oozing from every pore as he eyed the Captain’s wife in a way that only someone like Lancaster could get away with. Continue reading “From Here to Eternity (1953)”