When we last left headband-clad biker tough Trash at the end of 1990: The Bronx Warriors, he was wandering the wreckage of his beloved Bronx after firing a grappling hook into Vic Morrow and briefly lamenting the death of the girl who had first caused him to rip off the plot of Escape From New York. Continue reading “Escape from the Bronx (1983)”
Category: 1980s
1990: The Bronx Warriors (1982)
The year is 1990 and the Bronx has been declared a “No Man’s Land” where the only law is the law that the various gangs can enforce on their own. I wasn’t too sure why the people in charge just threw up their hands and said “we give up” on the Bronx, but I’m guessing that maybe if you lived there in 1982 when this movie was made, you would understand.
The action in this movie stems from the fact that Ann is about to turn of age and inherit her interest in the Manhattan Corporation, the world’s largest arms dealer. She doesn’t want to be someone’s puppet in business matters, so she does what any smart business person would do in such a situation and flees to the no man’s land that is the Bronx. Continue reading “1990: The Bronx Warriors (1982)”
Delirium (1987)
This stalk and slash flick stars a woman that some genius dubbed the “Dolly Parton of Italy.” Having seen some of Straight Talk, I can assure each and every one of you that the woman in this movie (Serena Grandi) is just like an Italian Dolly Parton because she can’t act either. Continue reading “Delirium (1987)”
Evil Dead Trap (1988)
Nami is the host a late night talk show and one of the segments they do is to feature home videos that their fans send in. And while we here in America have proven for decades our healthy obsession with funny home videos about pets doing weird things, people catching on fire at weddings and guys getting whacked in the balls, Nami’s viewers take this family friendly past time in a decidedly much more twisted direction!
One of the viewer submitted tapes shows someone going through the city and ending up at an abandoned factory where a woman is tortured and killed. To establish that this is one of those “over the top” movies we get a nice long, loving shot of a knife going into her eyeball. Nami is horrified and does what any of us would do. She gets four members of her crew together and they follow the landmarks that were on the video tape and go to the abandoned factory. Continue reading “Evil Dead Trap (1988)”
Opera (1987)
All the good moments in this one belong to a bunch of noisy birds. And the birds, with their ear-rending squawking, are some of the most obnoxious members of the cast!
If their constant cacophony doesn’t completely put you off of this giallo from Dario Argento, the nauseatingly swirling camera shots he uses to show the birds’ point of view surely will. And if you can somehow manage to stomach all of that, there’s still the fact that this thing revolves around people screeching at the top of their lungs at an opera to run off whatever audience still remains. Continue reading “Opera (1987)”
Thunder III (1988)
The first time was for his ancient Indian burial ground! The second time was for his wife’s miscarriage! Now, Thunder is back for his biggest, most destructive revenge mission of all! When the local yokels destroyed Thunder’s RV park, they should have made sure he was in the camper, too! Continue reading “Thunder III (1988)”
Thunder II (1987)
When we last saw Thunder, he was shooting arrows into cops, blowing up cars with a bazooka, and demolishing a bank and the police station in his home town with a stolen front end loader. Forced to take the law into his own hands when an Indian burial ground was being desecrated and when his girlfriend was almost raped, Thunder clearly didn’t have the time or patience for the White Man’s law. Especially since it was being enforced by crooked cops who hated Indians! It makes perfect sense then that Thunder II finds Thunder a deputy sheriff! Continue reading “Thunder II (1987)”