Category: Martial Arts

Stranglehold (1994)

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StrangleholdCoverA madman has seized control of Malaysia’s newest chemical plant! His team of terrorists control thousands of gallons of the deadliest nerve gas ever created! Their demands are simple – millions of dollars or a hostage will be killed once per hour, culminating in the execution of this big haired blonde congresswoman bimbo from Ohio they have kidnapped!

Who can break this stranglehold they have on our freedom and safety? A special forces team is being assembled, but they’re all the way over in freaking Thailand! If only there was someone on the scene with the weapons and tactics training! Someone with lethal kickboxing skills! Someone with a dinky little pony tail! Continue reading “Stranglehold (1994)” →

A Good Man (2014)

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“No joy! No joy!” a desperate Ghost radios to the drone operators about to rain Hellfire missiles down on a terrorist hideout! The evil Islamic bad guy, code named Abu Normal, is using human shields!

But even after Ghost terminates Abu, the drone fires! Ghost grabs a nearby child and dives out of the way of the incoming missile causing engineers at Lockheed Martin to no doubt wonder what sort of superhuman could have avoided certain death at the hands of their $110,000 per unit airborne assassin! Continue reading “A Good Man (2014)” →

Excessive Force (1993)

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This is a great movie. If you’re Thomas Ian Griffith. Excessive Force is Griffith’s masturbatory fantasy where he’s a tough cop who plays by his own rules. As the writer and star, Griffith manages to leave no stone unturned in search of every 12 year old boy’s idea of how these rogue cop movies are supposed to go. Which I would be totally in favor of if Griffith wasn’t such a tool. Continue reading “Excessive Force (1993)” →

Operation Cobra (1997)

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While there may not actually be an Operation Cobra per se taking place in the film (possibly because the movie’s real title was Inferno), that doesn’t mean you aren’t getting your fair share of cloak and dagger scheming and double-crossing. Plus, Don “The Dragon” Wilson does shoot a cobra and another guy gets bit on his head, so it isn’t like those watching for the snake action got ripped off. Continue reading “Operation Cobra (1997)” →

Night Hunter (1996)

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I’ve never seen any of the Blade movies. It’s a toss up as to which I’m less interested in – vampires or Wesley Snipes.

These vampires are always swishing their romance novel cover long hair around, resplendent in their European finery and prone to mucking about with goblets and come hither looks any normal woman would laugh off.

There’s also usually talk about vampire families that date back hundreds of years and how powerful they all are. If they’re really so powerful, why are they generally unknown to the world at large and getting killed by vampire hunters who couldn’t possibly have all the resources that these supposedly old, well-connected families have had centuries to build up? Continue reading “Night Hunter (1996)” →

Automatic (1995)

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It’s Terminator meets Die Hard meets Frankenstein meets an Olivier Gruner movie! And that means exactly two things: lots of scenes of guys crawling in air shafts, elevator shafts and sliding down trash chutes and that I’m turning on the closed captioning so that I have a fighting chance to understand just what in the hell Olivier is muttering about this time! Don’t worry though if you’re like most of Olivier’s fans and can’t read because Olivier does most of his muttering in this one with futuristic guns and futuristic android kung fu! Continue reading “Automatic (1995)” →

Hawk’s Vengeance (1996)

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The local crime boss is using a skinhead gang to capture members of a Chinese gang so that their organs can be harvested. A local cop gets a little too nosy and is snuffed out by a pair of hitmen employed by the crime boss. His step brother, Hawk, travels back to the United States from his native England to attend the funeral and decides to dig a little deeper into his step brother’s death.

Hawk has some help from a Chinese buddy who knew his brother as well as his brother’s former partner, a blonde chick prone to lecturing Hawk on staying out of her investigation while standing around in a bra and leather skirt. Most of Hawk’s help though comes from the fact that he’s the very best British Special Forces marine ever! In short, this is your typical Gary Daniels movie. Thank God! Continue reading “Hawk’s Vengeance (1996)” →