Ants are our most fearsome and deadly bug and understandably so. With their eight big hairy legs, eight nasty eyes and sometimes being the size of a dinner plate, I wouldn’t want to wake up finding myself staring at their gigantic fangs which are just itching to inject some kill juice into me! Throw in the business where they spin webs, and wrap their prey into cocoons so they can suck the blood clean out of them and you have yourself the Terminator of creepy crawlies! Continue reading “Phase IV (1974)”
Category: 1970s
Jack and the Beanstalk (1970)
Fee, fi, fo, fum! I smell the stench of another shabby Barry Mahon kiddie picture! This is the other movie on the DVD from Something Weird that features The Wonderful Land Of Oz, a movie that looks positively big budget compared to this one.
At least Barry’s ill-advised trip to Oz actually had the actors in costume, In Jack And The Beanstalk, most of the folks who wander around the set are dressed up like they were extras on an episode of The Brady Bunch, resulting in some scary striped pants, fringed vests, and a haircut for Jack that Peter Brady would have appreciated. Continue reading “Jack and the Beanstalk (1970)”
A Scream in the Streets (1973)
I realize that many of you are hoping against all hope that I’ll tell you that this is worth your time and money. You have fond memories of Starsky and Hutch, S.W.A.T., The Rookies and all those other old copper shows with big cars, kicking music and guys that spit Miranda Warnings out like they were hairballs and all you want is a sleazy take on that genre. Well, let me you leave without any doubt in one department – this one is plenty sleazy. For a softcore porn movie that is. Ugh. Continue reading “A Scream in the Streets (1973)”
Superdad (1973)
I thought I was watching a douche commercial when this movie began. With its shot of two people on a beach and its cloying “These Are The Best Times” song playing in the background, I assumed that a regular dosing of Superdad was going to refresh my most secret of places. Sadly though, I was left with that not so fresh feeling and even more incredibly, by the time Superdad complains to his daughter at her wedding that he smells, I was wishing that this was a douche commercial! Continue reading “Superdad (1973)”
Deep Red (1975)
Deep Red echoes Daro Argento’s earlier (and not as good) The Bird With The Crystal Plumage with its tale of a foreigner in Rome witnessing and getting himself mixed up in a murder (and getting everyone around him killed along the way). Don’t let the fact that this feels like an instance of a director remaking his own movie deter you from checking it out because Argento is able to play up his strengths (kinetic camera work, sudden vicious violence, a sense of isolation) and jettison all the barnacles that slow his other pictures down (pointless red herrings, lazy plotting, all the self-referential crap that helped to sink Tenebre). Continue reading “Deep Red (1975)”
Don’t Torture a Duckling (1972)
After watching this movie I came to a couple of conclusions. The first is that despite this being directed by their idol, Lucio Fulci, the gorehounds will be somewhat disappointed with it. The second thing I figured out is that in spite of Fulci’s reputation, anyone that enjoys a good, unsettling thriller will come away feeling very satisfied with what they’ve seen. The last and by far the most important thing I learned was that the title refers to a retarded girl’s Donald Duck doll.
Strange things are happening in a small Italian village. Strange things like little boys turning up dead and a dirty woman digging up a little baby skeleton. I suppose that qualifies as strange if you’ve never seen an Italian horror movie before, but those of us in the business see that kind of stuff a couple of times a week. Continue reading “Don’t Torture a Duckling (1972)”
Suspiria (1977)
Do not be fooled by the bold visuals and the spectacular murder set pieces that Dario Argento uses in this, the first of a trilogy of films which also includes Inferno and Mother Of Tears. When you look past the style he dresses this one up in, it all still boils down to a coven of super powerful witches defeated by a wispy American ballet student who’s in something like her second week at the ballet academy where this all takes place. Continue reading “Suspiria (1977)”