Category: Animated

The Great Mouse Detective (1986)

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What do you need to know about this, the twenty-sixth animated feature from Walt Disney? Just that while there were at least five books starring Basil, the mouse detective, there has only been just this one single movie based on those books. Not a sequel, not a Saturday morning television series, not an Ice Capades version or Broadway show, not even one of those money-grubbing straight to video knock-offs that pop up like a polyp on a middle-aged guy’s colon.

Disney was no doubt smarting from the fact that The Black Cauldron proved an extremely expensive and stinky stew back in 1985. Surely, this cheaper and more conventional tale of a mouse who has to foil the schemes of a rat to take over England with a robot queen built by an expert toy maker, was a very attractive follow up project to try and get back in the black. Continue reading “The Great Mouse Detective (1986)” →

The Nine Lives of Fritz the Cat (1974)

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This one sure made me long for the pretentious navel-gazing of the insipid baby boomer parable Fritz the Cat. Two years after everyone was impressed by a horny, foul-mouth, drug-addled cartoon cat that was long on posing and short on everything else, the expected cash-in sequel was released and the results were pretty much what you would expect. Except nine times worse!

It’s a hodgepodge of stories where Fritz is apparently imagining his life in different scenarios. These scenes are partly designed to be shocking and partly designed to be topical. Thus you get scenes of Fritz hanging out with Hitler and also flying to Mars.

Fritz has apparently recovered nicely from the substantial injuries he suffered when that power plant blew up at the end of the first movie because he is now out of school and married to this fat broad who does nothing but criticize him for everything he does (drugs) and doesn’t do (work). Continue reading “The Nine Lives of Fritz the Cat (1974)” →

Fritz the Cat (1972)

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Fritz is a student at NYU, though like most of these pampered college kids he never actually goes to class. Of course, even if he did, he’d just have those left-wing professors feeding them that anti-American, anti-Christian crap these pinko infested campuses are bastions for. Instead of being brainwashed in class though, Fritz heads to the park with his guitar and a couple of buddies, but their band only really goes into action when some big-bootied gals wander by, showing us that they have what it takes to be rock stars!

Eventually, he discovers that the ladies flock to a crow (they represent the black folks in this movie) and try to impress him with all their white guilt and classes they’re taking in African studies. He blows them off, giving the enterprising Fritz his opening. He lets loose with a torrent of babble about how his soul hurts and he’s on a quest for meaning and all the other great intellectual challenges that have fueled hours of upper middle class faux-conversations for years. And of course it works! Continue reading “Fritz the Cat (1972)” →