Urban Warriors (1987)

What took man centuries to build, Italian film director Giuseppe Vari takes seconds to destroy through a barrage of mushroom cloud stock footage! Even more terrifying is that Vari apparently got a buy one, get one free deal on stock footage because he follows up his mushroom clouds with shots of volcanoes erupting!

There’s no need to fret though that he’s going to use the volcanoes to do something silly like having Earth overrun by lava monsters. Vari knows that what will happen following an apocalyptic nuclear war is an immediate rise in the population of mutant biker gangs! Continue reading “Urban Warriors (1987)”

Hell’s Belles (1969)

This is the movie where Jeremy Slate finally puts it all together! At last, Jeremy Slate unleashed and untamed, riding roughshod all over the desert southwest in search of his stolen motorbike, a taciturn biker-cowboy who lives by his own code! And who loves on his own terms!

The promise he showed in the laughable Hell’s Angels propaganda movie, Hell’s Angels ’69 comes to fruition with his steady and steely performance in Hell’s Belles as he’s freed of his dopey sidekick Tom Stern as well as the even dopier story from that flimsy film. Continue reading “Hell’s Belles (1969)”

Hell’s Angels ’69 (1969)

The selling point with this biker flick is that the unkempt guys with bad attitudes are the real Hell’s Angels. How that was supposed to be a selling point eludes me since the only thing I learned about Sonny Barger and his Hell’s Angles from this movie is that they drink a lot of beer, smart off to authority figures, don’t practice much in the way of motorcycle safety, and are easily duped by outsiders. Continue reading “Hell’s Angels ’69 (1969)”

1990: The Bronx Warriors (1982)

The year is 1990 and the Bronx has been declared a “No Man’s Land” where the only law is the law that the various gangs can enforce on their own. I wasn’t too sure why the people in charge just threw up their hands and said “we give up” on the Bronx, but I’m guessing that maybe if you lived there in 1982 when this movie was made, you would understand.

The action in this movie stems from the fact that Ann is about to turn of age and inherit her interest in the Manhattan Corporation, the world’s largest arms dealer. She doesn’t want to be someone’s puppet in business matters, so she does what any smart business person would do in such a situation and flees to the no man’s land that is the Bronx. Continue reading “1990: The Bronx Warriors (1982)”

Psychomania (1973)

PsychomaniaPosterAs soon as you see a dude in his colors straddling his chrome horse and eating up blacktop while the pigs are sucking his fumes, you know you’re in for another biker gang movie full of drinking, brawling, and weird slang. You could take it or leave it, right? But what would you say if this was a biker gang who died and came back as zombies? And what if it starred Oscar winning film legend George Sanders? I know exactly what you’d say: looks we finally solved the mystery of why Oscar winning film legend George Sanders committed suicide right after making this movie! Continue reading “Psychomania (1973)”