Among the Roger Corman adaptations of Edgar Allan Poe’s various works, The Masque Of The Red Death stands out as one of the best, featuring superior production values (they flew over to England for a tax break and apparently ended up re-using the sets from Beckett), an appropriately vile performance by Vincent Price as Prince Prospero, and a story that was more than the standard old dark house with degenerate families story that seemed to permeate these productions like the stench of a corpse moldering in a secret chamber somewhere in the living room walls. It didn’t hurt this movie any either when this midget burned alive a guy in a gorilla suit. Continue reading “The Masque of the Red Death (1964)”
Modesty Blaise (1966)
One has to wonder after enduring two hours of this mess whether its audience of 1966 was in on the joke or whether it was only the movie that thought all its mod design, dreadfully long scenes that went nowhere and dialogue that rarely made any sense were the pinnacle of mid-sixties cool. Continue reading “Modesty Blaise (1966)”
The Premature Burial (1962)
Way back in the 1800s, man’s greatest fear was being buried alive. Medical science wasn’t as evolved as it is today, so the ignorant masses were afraid that when they took an afternoon siesta after a particularly large tankard of ale and gruel, their overeager relatives would see this as a chance to get their mitts on all their worldly possessions (lice-infested cloak, rusty shovel, and empty tankard – stuff like that no doubt), proclaim the unfortunate chap dead and have the little bugger all buried just before he wakes up wondering why the devil his mouth is full of dirt and maggots are trying to move in on his soft parts. Continue reading “The Premature Burial (1962)”
Mission Stardust (1967)
Mission Stardust is an out of this world space race of bad plotting, deliriously inept special effects, and characters who seem intent on proving to one another which one of them is the stupidest. That interstellar stud Perry Rhodan ended up getting a nice dose of space booty at the end of the film while evil kingpin Arkin found himself chucked out an airlock merely proves that in life, it’s only results that matter. Continue reading “Mission Stardust (1967)”
Only Angels Have Wings (1939)
Cary Grant plays Geoff “Pop” Carter and if you find yourself trying to stifle a giggle when you first see him and he’s decked out like some sort of jungle Indiana Jones with his wide brimmed hat, safari clothes, and six shooter strapped to his hip, don’t worry. It isn’t long before he slaps on his flying leathers and starts looking like the hard driving, risk taking, mail jockey whose hair is just as oiled up as the propeller on old #4 he truly is. Continue reading “Only Angels Have Wings (1939)”
Blood Suckers (1970)
Instantly boring, this British production (originally titled Incense for the Damned) about a guy who goes to Greece because he’s impotent and ends up getting turned into a vampire by a sexy woman also manages to be insanely stupid. While I’m sure this movie had great appeal for all those British dudes without any motion in their ocean, for us American guys with plenty of rise in our Levis, the whole thing seemed a bit silly! Continue reading “Blood Suckers (1970)”
Hercules vs. the Moloch (1963)
Okay, it turns out that this Hercules vs. the Moloch movie (aka Conquest of Mycene) isn’t about a guy named Hercules. It also isn’t a movie about a guy named Goliath, Maciste, Samson, Atlas, or even Ursus. It’s all about this guy named Glauco, who perhaps realizing a movie called Glauco vs. the Moloch wouldn’t have quite the same impact, decided that he should spend a good portion of this film undercover as a guy named Hercules. Continue reading “Hercules vs. the Moloch (1963)”