You know how I knew this was one serious apocalypse? It wasn’t because 99% of the human race had been wiped out. 99% of people are suck, plain and simple. An accidental release of a some kind of mega germ that did that is something I would characterize as more of a cure than a disaster. Continue reading “The Terror Within (1989)”
Count Yorga, Vampire (1970)
Count Yorga, Vampire wants to bring the vampire into the modern world to see what would happen if some jaded city dwellers encountered a creature they thought only existed in myth. The only problem is that the movie is so small-scale, none of the potentially interesting culture clashes between the old vampire and the happening young kids and their big scary city happen. Continue reading “Count Yorga, Vampire (1970)”
Written on the Wind (1956)
Finally, a movie that dramatizes the shame of being a rich alcoholic guy with a low sperm count! Continue reading “Written on the Wind (1956)”
The Beast Within (1982)
This is one of those “raping swamp monster meets I Was A Teenage Werewolf” movies that was all the rage back in the late 70s and early 80s. Writer Tom Holland (Child’s Play) apparently thinks we’ll be entertained by seeing women raped by slimy creatures and teenage boys turning into really icky and horny monsters. He obviously has us humans confused with hentai fans. Continue reading “The Beast Within (1982)”
Tomorrow Is Forever (1946)
Tomorrow Is Forever completely ignores any worries about coincidence piled atop happenstance heaped upon chance and hefts around its wildly unbelievable story with an Orson Welles-sized assurance only a classic old movie could have. Continue reading “Tomorrow Is Forever (1946)”
The Great Lie (1941)
The Great Lie recycles the same plot as an earlier Bette Davis movie, The Old Maid, only this time Davis is the one raising the kid that isn’t hers and lying to everyone about it. The Great Lie‘s great sin though isn’t reusing a story full of silly sacrifice and artificial drama, but that it is so damn gimpy in doing so! Continue reading “The Great Lie (1941)”
Superargo vs. Diabolicus (1966)
Even though I never deciphered what a Superargo was, I marvelled at both the genius of the idea as well as the flawless execution of it. What if you were to take a masked wrestler who was the very best at what he does (wrestle and stuff) and make him a secret agent?
And what if he had to foil a madman bent on world domination? And what if this wrestler had to take on an entire island lair of henchmen to save his girlfriend before the madman can blow the island up and escape in his rocket? And what if this wrestler was the heavyweight champion of the world?
And most importantly of all, would defeating this madman and causing his secret hideout to not only explode, but to sink straightaway into the sea count as one of his mandatory title defenses? Continue reading “Superargo vs. Diabolicus (1966)”