Has there ever been a movie in the history of the world that was any good and had a “4” at the end of the title? Zombi 3, for those of us still in therapy and repressing most of it, is the movie that Lucio Fulci began, but quit and that Bruno Mattei finished up for him. But don’t rip your own intestines out yet! This isn’t really a sequel! Shot simply as After Death, the slapping of the zombie tag on the film was merely a marketing gimmick! No need to worry that the film won’t utterly fail because it’s trying to continue whatever was happening in the previous gooey mess. It will utterly fail on its own merits! Continue reading
Dear Diary: Woke up, went out to the woods to shoot my horror movie, and got caught up in a zombie invasion. Considering what a bunch of unsupportive jerks my “friends” were during the filming of my own movie, I can’t say that I’m terribly upset that they keep getting picked off one by one as we drive a beat up RV to various Canadian locales disguised as Pennsylvania. Continue reading
Let’s just cut to the chase. I can say without any reservation that Day of the Dead 2: Contagium is simply a great movie. For Thermos. Continue reading
As expected, Day Of The Dead (2008 edition – now with CGI!) is horrible, but in its defense, it never really gets as horrible as I assumed it would be when my Zombie Movie Obsessive Compulsive Disorder got the better of me and I couldn’t stop myself from watching since it had “dead” in the title.
Sure, there were plenty of reasons to hate this movie (Mena Suvari as a tough as nails soldier? I had to look in the mirror to make sure some zombie virus hadn’t attacked my freaking brain when I heard that one!), but whenever my hatred would edge into murderous loathing territory, Nick Cannon would go and do something like kick a severed zombie head like a soccer ball while dispensing some potty mouthed bit of dialogue! Continue reading
Director George Romero commits the cardinal sin of attaching a group of completely unlikable characters to a story that not only is uninteresting, but ridiculous, even in a genre that saw a zombie fight a shark (the fast-paced Zombie) and nude anthropology (the wholly superior piece of trash Hell Of The Living Dead). Continue reading
As a Board certified expert on voodoo, I know exactly two things about our most popular horror movie religion. One is that voodoo dolls are a must for dealing with exes. And two, you never ignore stories from the superstitious natives about what the evil juju man is doing and how the dead are coming back to life!
Any four year old versed in West African religious traditions will tell you that juju and voodoo are two separate belief systems and that these two teaming up on one cursed island is the supernatural equivalent of the Tripartite Pact! But with zombies! And sharks! And topless scuba diving! Continue reading
You probably remember the tagline from this movie’s poster: When there is no more room in hell, the dead will rise and work in an old abandoned tin mine in Cornwall. You can imagine the terror that strikes in the hearts of out of work miners everywhere. With increased automation, jobs going overseas, and lower wages and benefits, now there’s competition from dead people! And they don’t have to worry about black lung disease because they don’t even breathe! Continue reading
It’s a question that’s vexed cineastes for more than a generation, sparking heated debate and rending friendships asunder! Everyone has an opinion on it and most have come to realize that like politics, religion and soccer, it’s just not something to discuss in polite company! I am referring of course to the severed zombie head in the refrigerator scene in Zombi 3! Continue reading
After having seen Dawn of the Dead about ten different times, the prospect of watching it yet again filled me with the kind of dread I usually reserve for when I’m watching those Paul Naschy movies where he turns into a werewolf and is thus forced to run around shirtless. Continue reading