It’s a fencer’s worst nightmare come horribly true! Three time state champion Alex Freyer is battling for a potential national title as well as a spot on the next Olympic team! During his match after a bunch of thrusting, parrying, and whatever else passes for manly fighting action in a fencing contest, Alex sticks his opponent in the chest! And total disaster strikes! His sword breaks and goes right into the guy’s face! Continue reading “Ring of Steel (1994)”
The Crazies (1973)
By now I think that every one of us is sick to death of seeing the original Night of the Living Dead and the original Dawn of the Dead. I suppose a few of you are suffering from a little Day of the Dead fatigue as well, but for my money, I can never get enough of that profanity-inclined group of dysfunctional soldiers and scientists that inhabit their cozy little missile silo while they farm zombies for some crackpot reason. Continue reading “The Crazies (1973)”
Warbus (1986)
Fernando Baldi, who spearheaded Italy’s efforts in the early 1980s revival of 3-D movies with Comin’ At Ya! and Treasure Of The Four Crowns, followed those films by taking up the flag for the “school bus goes to war” genre and he proves himself as more than capable of bringing out the drama that’s inherent in a tale of grizzled marines driving a bright yellow school bus through an enemy-infested Vietnam.
While inevitably inviting comparisons to other school bus war movies such as Pierluigi Ciriaci’s War Bus Commando, Warbus takes a more realistic approach to driving a school bus in the middle of a warzone and ratchets up the suspense by giving each character a tortured backstory. Continue reading “Warbus (1986)”
War Bus Commando (1989)
This time all our school buses loaded with the Shah of Iran’s stolen gold come home!
Genial special forces operative and all around killing machine Johnny Hondo has only been back home at his Montana ranch for a month following a daytime rescue mission (during which he was inexplicably dressed in black) in Soviet-occupied Afghanistan when his country comes calling again!
General Ross tells Johnny that his father, General Hondo, is dying in Washington! A deathbed conversation is quickly arranged for the Hondos and the General sends his son on one final explosive suicide mission!
General Hondo makes it clear that there is no chance for Johnny to succeed, but that he needs to do it to restore his old man’s military honor! Continue reading “War Bus Commando (1989)”
Kick Fighter (1989)
Sometimes when I’m studying these kick fighting movies, I get the distinct impression that no one involved in the movie has any idea what to do in between fight scenes. In Kick Fighter for instance, we are subjected to a birthday party for Kick Fighter’s sister. Continue reading “Kick Fighter (1989)”
Beneath the Bermuda Triangle (1997)
I’ll admit it. When the documentary/boring sci-fi movie The Dark Side of the Moon posited the theory that the Bermuda Triangle was actually a gateway to the moon that Satan was using to harvest souls to use in his war against God, I found myself nodding my head and thinking that that sounded pretty reasonable.
But as much as I felt that this Satanic doorway to the moon theory was on target, something about it nagged at me. For the longest time, I couldn’t quite pin down why I wasn’t totally sold on it. And then, just like that, God dumped another low budget video on me! This time with the real truth behind the Bermuda Triangle! Continue reading “Beneath the Bermuda Triangle (1997)”
The Dark Side of the Moon (1990)
It’s Satan vs. the Mullet! In outer space! With not much at stake! And one of the more bogus mysteries of all time solved!
I’ll be the first to admit though that despite that really great set up, the movie failed to deliver on its obvious promise.
The movie’s script was the root of its problems since I didn’t understand anything that was happening. Twin brothers apparently wrote it and they must have been using that twin ESP all twins have so that it made sense to them, but not to us non-twins that weren’t plugged into their secret language. Continue reading “The Dark Side of the Moon (1990)”